作者:查尔斯.布考斯基
1 ?; Z) U) a9 z翻译:莫笑愚% a$ n |9 i/ k& U2 o# I
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《自杀的孩子》: ?+ l9 x7 j9 i4 P# s: `
9 w3 i: k# ]7 j5 e我去了最糟的酒吧
' c+ v6 \; f k1 z# n$ L指望在那儿, S, e: c6 R, z! ~+ C1 V4 g
被谋杀。
l d `' A; p6 e% V9 a6 u" [但我所能做的只是% i4 M$ ] x8 K, ]
再次将自己
3 h; R! s9 @/ [ `' P2 V$ ?& S灌醉。5 ?. k8 x+ P% M: v9 {
更糟的是,酒友们甚至8 B& a8 O8 s7 P& h
开始
# r7 \2 J- \1 I喜欢我了。
& V- q% s4 a1 D& f2 B! K我在那儿只想惹怒别人$ X2 H9 d' P# ]: {( l2 ]
并被推入黑暗的
! p1 L6 Y w$ n, ~, b深渊
+ O7 p# o0 g1 B结果是我赢得了3 ~+ }) t0 g$ M# [$ X9 H0 Z* @' D
免费饮品
6 J! ]" _* R: r8 j& E恰逢某地" c5 _* L0 n5 ?$ ~# g* M
某个0 @: I y* D# O# H2 d! J7 B
龟儿子躺在医院的
. ]' c5 l! E2 u; M+ W i; C k) |! x病床上,
1 n& d9 i3 w6 ]4 P全身插满了$ S. l. j/ B; y
管子' t' T, w. G I
为了活着,他拼命挣扎2 Y. E% E+ A) y% I* |* G) e
使出了吃奶的劲。 R* D b( g8 r' m Y- ]8 U% b( h
无人会助我0 a+ ~3 n7 u: u8 f# T4 a1 G
死亡8 E; Q Q! [. n/ `
当我们畅饮
, n! S9 m) r6 C: i1 y8 ?" ^( O达旦,( B5 K( R! O; g; ~
当第二天
4 D1 p( H& }. Y等着我" H: ?2 z6 V' c* Y
用它的钢钳,( Y3 k A9 }' I7 @
用它臭气熏天的
, y1 a* v0 ^8 W6 a# i4 L m+ {$ J匿名,7 |, E6 Y4 l/ F$ S6 [8 s! r
它暧昧的3 C! \5 `; {0 C2 j) t
态度。
# x8 |* o: d1 {" H+ V死亡并非总是
* M! y# q- p1 b0 Y# t+ k3 Y4 f如期而至& f) B# u+ H. _& A' p* I6 D# x& s7 p
当你呼唤
2 q" A% ^, E$ t4 W它,
6 H2 W# v0 m" m% N哪怕你从一个
# W" i. y$ R9 ~闪光的7 _# [7 o, A+ c0 O- D& a0 R( m
城堡
/ L9 Y) Q5 K- r% U9 X j或者从一艘远洋游轮" |$ e6 t: O1 }& U$ }' ^
或者从地球上
- n4 D; C5 x* `1 M5 ]最好(或最差)& i* G4 G4 {/ N; e+ X q
的酒吧呼
' f1 q/ q2 V" ~+ N2 ~; x6 \' m3 P唤它。
8 c2 g/ L; ?/ j7 C' F8 F如此无礼
2 t* z; d) E7 _; o. Q T' d! {只会令众神/ q# G$ L! I. H( @/ s! }
犹豫并. n. t2 Z& y3 Y! X: s2 ]
推迟死期。7 O3 b* e) m9 y
问我:我已% c/ C& R' @( l* F9 W" S
72岁了。& @3 g7 H) b2 y$ D3 o
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《致拿走我诗歌的荡妇》* v' N, | a6 n6 `) ]& Y8 ^6 K
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有人说该让悔恨远离
4 L. P( L% ?5 {5 c& S8 m诗歌,
" s; h5 }/ T2 A+ A3 B8 P: P该抽象,这貌似有理,
& J; D* V. J' e X1 c$ @但是耶稣啊;
! y7 }! q5 L# t) B$ j6 c6 R12首诗歌失踪了我连尸首也找不到而你还拿走了. ?% X6 |8 f% P6 I: T
我的3 A5 r9 S$ A {9 T
油画,我最好的墨宝; 这令我窒息;
' m2 K0 c* ], C+ D9 e难道你也像她们一样要榨干我的皮?0 k; b4 v/ L+ S+ A* _( G
为何不拿走我的现金?她们通常会从一个醉醺醺
9 F6 Y2 p) ^7 N, m/ C L9 a- _3 w$ r昏睡在角落的醉鬼裤兜里拿走金钱
; P- m5 _0 E$ z下次就拿走我的左臂或者一张50元的钞票
9 [& b5 l8 K6 h; ^2 x7 @) F' Y但不要拿走我的诗歌:: `" N0 T* @- d! C( _2 T+ k
我并非莎士比亚" D: ~+ P' z; t- j; m1 o2 P
但有时候就是) p& V9 A* h" h, t
再也不会有诗歌,抽象或其它;
! E' B3 M' H" z4 t0 c$ E7 z但钱和荡妇和醉鬼却总是遍地皆是) l, f# c2 t; M ^5 K2 @6 Z8 Z
直至最后一枚炸弹,9 t, z/ [( R1 |7 \; V9 v% l$ }
但正如上帝所说,
+ I. c9 T( W" {0 w/ {9 K当他翘着二郎腿儿,3 J; M! ]( ] r F! p5 u
我知道我在何处造就了许多诗人
5 g* ~) k. ^0 [9 K+ R而并非众多
' Z# g3 X7 y' F6 v2 ~诗歌。7 Z9 }* E. A; j/ y4 q; e' R3 U' R! _
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附英文原文:9 ^, O5 {+ l4 r' ?/ S
7 T. o# j: K" `* _1 h8 J/ B6 @+ `THE SUICIDE KID9 g" _& q! d2 i) O! o
by Charles Bukowski
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I went to the worst of bars9 r3 O. U' k0 {( V3 N+ z
hoping to get
1 L3 p" `: R. C, ? L; Z# Ykilled.
$ l& v7 ?' X/ v9 @but all I could do was to) b1 ~0 s: ~$ r
get drunk. y2 G6 x6 E4 S: |; e" {
again.
( W9 i+ |. P' d9 Hworse, the bar patrons even
3 ^. A. F; O+ l, j7 L+ Aended up8 u2 {- y& v0 G/ l2 T- C
liking me.+ K. l* X, x5 o8 F& e' a5 `& u
there I was trying to get) b1 J/ d' C( c! n1 \* V* D; z* ]
pushed over the dark) v* K* V9 E6 s E
edge, L5 l! r/ Q! K- k: V" ?& Z0 S
and I ended up with
" ^# ~! x/ A( y0 tfree drinks# N# e0 _7 U/ o* T
while somewhere else( Q9 r. X# ^# u& o
some poor. h# x% n* G* i6 z% ]' c p
son-of-a-bitch was in a hospital
9 h1 o; o8 i+ O0 x0 ]* J8 ebed,
8 d: E5 I: N8 e/ o/ ytubes sticking out all over
; o |2 h+ _. L( I3 w$ dhim. n. \3 A$ L- ?. I# u$ n
as he fought like hell8 f. A; j) G0 H2 J) |
to live.
. ^# n, c/ b1 R' Q$ y% @# Unobody would help me; K k' @& p+ H# ?) B# U, k/ r6 R9 ~
die as& [, }* D6 O" _6 A
the drinks kept! `2 Y+ d. p1 c* c
coming,4 t1 i2 y) B: R7 f- M2 w/ r
as the next day
) U+ ]8 T' ]- u$ V6 o, s+ twaited for me
: y: H5 g4 v% P" h* |with its steel clamps,
5 ^+ a' G3 H# Zits stinking5 b4 p3 s0 X, o+ }5 h d
anonymity,
4 S) z/ h3 n! ]# A5 ]8 Dits incognisant % S0 _$ J5 t% L" H5 N3 x0 Y
attitude.& i" T6 \; q5 Y0 O; [1 U& z
death doesn’t always
$ V% F$ a4 I7 D8 P7 n! gcome running" U1 u& z/ i; N/ }
when you call, m: C; b, a6 @$ j7 J
it,1 N: a5 ?9 X/ t" C1 C7 a8 B5 ~
not even if you
$ \% ?& Y, s+ d& G& h5 b4 acall it/ v+ l# ]' j" _2 x# H/ A3 R3 c: \, ^
from a shining
5 _" q+ h: V% {/ {6 X. fcastle
; _" ^; I9 X' Q! Aor from an ocean liner
* U* q# W$ z/ M3 S eor from the best bar
8 S8 H2 `: }6 r2 K+ ]. |on earth (or the V, _( M9 j; o$ D; P% Q
worst).
( @9 ?+ p! Z# ^' W8 W! tsuch impertinence
a$ ~6 d5 ^2 [, t& }only makes the gods
7 u1 l. U* n; G) zhesitate and2 ~0 f0 p& ^4 ~8 U% q$ m* {8 ^4 i
delay.
# W0 ~8 C" d& ~7 [- nask me: I’m6 u8 A' P) a% e( U+ c1 s2 `
72./ W2 o8 d2 V. C4 y
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( u2 {: h$ R* t# i6 STO THE WHORE WHO TOOK MY POEMS
! A: F. r2 I5 [) G2 o" i, ZBY CHARLES BUKOWSKI( s; @& O% L, O9 e% i( l+ o* e+ K
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some say we should keep personal remorse from the
' u- @1 s3 s( C! ?# y: o" H8 dpoem,
% X# B) ~$ k- l' j2 a% A) ystay abstract, and there is some reason in this,4 k) K* V8 E* _# a9 n
but jezus;& `5 t7 ?0 M$ w' _. N- d q
twelve poems gone and I don't keep carbons and you have" Y+ Q% e g; g
my / Q+ q2 T V+ M! N1 v& ?/ t
paintings too, my best ones; it's stifling;) ~ h6 w# P6 J
are you trying to crush me out like the rest of them?
/ }0 T1 u0 x7 X; u9 L0 g* fwhy didn't you take my money? they usually do! n% V; ^0 y7 i
from the sleeping drunken pants sick in the corner.7 h5 a) x) z5 T; _( x. G; Z6 L; @- Y
next time take my left arm or a fifty
' n5 c( Z3 V' D! x( Ubut not my poems:& R) b1 p" `( o0 E! i
I'm not Shakespeare
9 i: w) ~' T# {" o+ Zbut sometime simply, R: h9 s6 T& X- f) j
there won't be any more, abstract or otherwise;
! ]# @5 c* ~* I3 D0 tthere'll always be money and whores and drunkards
: p' U3 j. E# Udown to the last bomb,
0 I# ~' _8 l. c8 @/ ibut as God said,
* ^9 Q0 Y$ h, Zcrossing his legs,
3 d$ {' H; y/ S4 T$ f% d$ YI see where I have made plenty of poets2 c( g# ?" j/ `4 ?
but not so very much
+ c0 o3 N* J b+ u2 D( C6 S$ tpoetry.
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