作者:查尔斯.布考斯基) w" k9 q- X0 D0 I+ W. r
翻译:莫笑愚
4 P: D0 C% R, t, O, n+ [! D2 b. C( g& J/ V
8 Y4 `* D5 L7 T2 B) T
《自杀的孩子》
- f' c6 M+ W$ s2 x
. [$ Q* N" ?3 V7 h我去了最糟的酒吧3 z" v4 B& L4 w9 p) z( {
指望在那儿
" y5 e6 p% `3 ^& w被谋杀。
- S$ d2 J* r0 I5 E/ Z% }6 z9 q5 ?/ z但我所能做的只是& |. _, w, @7 _
再次将自己" T. M5 |8 A# [2 Q8 H
灌醉。$ x3 e/ u( }7 f9 G; ]
更糟的是,酒友们甚至: O! o! u2 s" T& d. H. [. ]* {
开始/ n" v, D* t/ a5 P4 T
喜欢我了。# o" H( l! K7 S' X
我在那儿只想惹怒别人
/ R& S6 s% U1 ~& O! _" x并被推入黑暗的! F( E4 D7 S1 A! Y: R
深渊3 F2 t) Y% l/ T9 M% H/ S: O
结果是我赢得了. C5 n4 n. p5 D' }* A
免费饮品
9 t, g: Y; Y( d( Z2 C恰逢某地 M) w; ]/ {4 I( G% w6 Z$ M, p8 t
某个
! K2 v9 a1 j. H) g! f. i, f3 H龟儿子躺在医院的
6 c1 V1 Y, |1 R. ?' ~ l! x+ P病床上,
. {7 M) {: L# w4 [/ c全身插满了
# L' v1 Z. E, J# A: R, h管子8 b" L- m- _6 C0 {% C$ a
为了活着,他拼命挣扎1 p* `3 ~( V' }# D
使出了吃奶的劲。; Q& }) d' }% k# L
无人会助我5 y0 e" a$ J5 q k0 S/ U" o9 i
死亡
) H& ] ?% [- {/ X当我们畅饮
& a6 _; V0 `. \2 Q- T4 i2 Y达旦,. r* }7 i2 E8 B$ ^. s
当第二天$ _2 `% `5 ^- m2 I- |. k Y
等着我& U# i, }1 W: q) \6 b
用它的钢钳,
6 F) f. U- F2 X/ C3 ~. x3 W# x用它臭气熏天的
( `' D6 L1 d( r8 m' [$ M匿名,* C% o/ ~1 {0 r/ p* K1 c
它暧昧的
: _1 _" n- e8 ^9 Z态度。
2 ~$ G/ g! {' @% X; g/ b! Z死亡并非总是% @& ^ M* J, B3 @
如期而至
9 j1 B+ g# N; D+ T4 e7 n当你呼唤
6 }' }0 q5 ?. C+ }$ j它,5 R5 F' m1 s" R( J9 p4 ]# Z0 K
哪怕你从一个
; i% y8 S" r. ?7 C闪光的% y) r( V! C# T0 ]) N- t& O
城堡
$ X3 r9 K, T+ q, H2 D. r; {或者从一艘远洋游轮, }6 h# N, H* E9 B u" W! m
或者从地球上7 ~, v9 t- H! ^; X) Q& e
最好(或最差)1 Z- U4 h1 b( r- x Y
的酒吧呼
7 S, [0 l" V* r, R9 H- f唤它。) _+ K( m: T- u- ]+ L T
如此无礼
: F5 s: H! S5 S/ q) B只会令众神0 R, D) S! o& _* U7 U7 A
犹豫并1 K# z7 p; U2 q# |& ?
推迟死期。
5 h4 c0 u1 o: u0 ?" p4 s问我:我已* |5 Z' |( N: B5 Z" F* ]
72岁了。
2 }4 ]! B: X. j/ {
, q8 G& E: F9 k. b7 s$ A6 l. ~
# v& L, m% M _7 [, C3 ]. U6 F7 k: ~ `/ @9 a* u' {$ L
《致拿走我诗歌的荡妇》
# Q6 t6 u/ h, w' F6 E* [( \
1 Q' T4 w- F9 w4 F! L) T9 D3 u2 d有人说该让悔恨远离$ m2 A# K3 ^3 {8 J* h
诗歌,) e- e5 t& g9 C% S
该抽象,这貌似有理,
. F3 ?9 V0 {3 v8 ?但是耶稣啊;0 e/ [. W, K( A7 h- m0 G
12首诗歌失踪了我连尸首也找不到而你还拿走了
" j9 E7 b2 P' u# X我的# U6 u/ C! l% L" [# c0 F
油画,我最好的墨宝; 这令我窒息;. e0 \& Y" o# Z6 y. D" n( p
难道你也像她们一样要榨干我的皮?' b" D7 i1 q# J! M5 h2 R
为何不拿走我的现金?她们通常会从一个醉醺醺
2 o# v% S1 s( L2 H" L昏睡在角落的醉鬼裤兜里拿走金钱4 s6 o' n* }/ r4 }
下次就拿走我的左臂或者一张50元的钞票
% }# K4 h$ u4 M4 w, |! h3 j4 r但不要拿走我的诗歌:9 K! g2 C5 P" ^$ r& U5 }2 H
我并非莎士比亚2 p+ g5 |" ^& m! L! |
但有时候就是
, t/ J8 B7 ^, f0 r- r8 I3 y再也不会有诗歌,抽象或其它;
7 F8 n! }6 Z% r但钱和荡妇和醉鬼却总是遍地皆是0 e! j. ]$ i# ] u: }* }
直至最后一枚炸弹,) i3 ^7 Z7 s- B* T4 D
但正如上帝所说,% h! o0 F) A' C
当他翘着二郎腿儿,& L; ?- m4 O9 I
我知道我在何处造就了许多诗人
; `5 H% K9 S2 U( n: Z, v0 T而并非众多* y- w# W2 H. h9 @2 c* ?- J1 b# D
诗歌。
4 Q: m# {! K, a) A/ x: U: i
7 R0 H, l# b: P# C4 \
0 P5 k G* ?! @& P$ p# L% Y2 x- H0 ?4 s6 q. D
附英文原文:
. s& R* J8 Q: l9 T
7 ^) O9 g% s: mTHE SUICIDE KID9 |3 q( ~0 j' c4 {1 V. R% J6 V! c
by Charles Bukowski
* A6 r& X0 s+ q+ {/ S1 l- Q3 u# H4 P" N" j. b* n9 z
: \2 ?; U+ J" U1 yI went to the worst of bars
$ p$ M' J/ h( O' P8 A0 `) Phoping to get
" h8 T4 j& y$ o8 I( u# wkilled.% U$ W) P1 _* Z Z- c
but all I could do was to
; c6 j7 X2 T6 ]/ r3 fget drunk
. P; ]+ V% s5 k, R/ @, a! Dagain.; l+ L( |2 U+ Z) o& n
worse, the bar patrons even$ W7 X- o9 T l/ `
ended up, {: N9 y7 X! w: a6 r! H6 d
liking me.
' ^1 G$ T3 r+ @there I was trying to get$ s! m7 V7 f% t8 e7 k* B9 B/ M
pushed over the dark" X0 A" N. O* R1 B
edge R. q: g' l% L! @# w6 m: H2 }
and I ended up with2 p. y8 X6 s& v+ h) G
free drinks* C% x. e) n6 I5 x
while somewhere else4 s0 `) F. X* F" p5 b) v
some poor h: p6 ~! s, r# h* [
son-of-a-bitch was in a hospital9 ]8 Y: A" U" h0 B% [+ }/ o
bed,+ ?- Y6 t! F' Y% S
tubes sticking out all over+ E# [; w2 a% ?' G8 e* T
him, g2 G6 b! C8 w9 g
as he fought like hell
' H+ `) m4 x1 k! l X, p; Xto live.) t% c) x" U P" Y# M
nobody would help me$ Z) C" _3 d8 d% l" b' _
die as: m( ]$ |+ h( t9 {# @
the drinks kept
6 O9 @" {' h& B6 p8 _& n, ccoming, h2 l* n& w S0 y$ U$ J& n- n. S$ D
as the next day
5 [6 S' {/ V: p/ N) @waited for me, r4 i! Z% j6 W) }5 u
with its steel clamps,
% W) }+ o4 U' D" S6 G# pits stinking
' a, c# J# B! ranonymity,) y3 c* V: V i! \% a* S
its incognisant 9 n9 ~7 [; j( ?9 U" O; a9 Z
attitude.1 g/ ^' ]) V4 m4 p. T+ }* F
death doesn’t always
% q% v; P6 `" @( Acome running/ l3 A c+ l9 c" t0 U8 `5 h
when you call
; V: B/ e; ]# Nit,# E7 c0 R* B6 S1 w1 t S0 Y' y$ S
not even if you6 F' n7 j4 T( u) j9 w
call it6 j! f# q& L- X/ @! i
from a shining
# G/ [- S- `" w& y3 k$ j; Lcastle
2 @) T) X2 ?* m; D% L M* For from an ocean liner. ^; } h, T E1 \
or from the best bar5 ~0 \! I9 V4 o8 a0 i: b
on earth (or the0 X! b$ ?; U; C
worst).: d% c1 e! z. M0 O1 ^$ S
such impertinence
' H, U/ B: Z5 S3 c" Konly makes the gods5 G. t7 D4 n& Z3 T' y) b+ [
hesitate and
0 j, W* C- x2 i y% R9 idelay.4 j( t. J: h7 n$ d- o3 u
ask me: I’m+ d4 P$ r, u" k/ h0 j
72.
1 N; w+ y, y8 O) l1 G2 G* G1 q3 M; P% X
6 b3 R$ w0 m. {& [: v. x
% Y' d$ K; Y9 d/ {% I1 NTO THE WHORE WHO TOOK MY POEMS
% |" v( y/ k* Z, l' }BY CHARLES BUKOWSKI
0 ^6 S% h* Y R& r" L' u% L( I9 s3 u; ]6 Z2 Y% z7 M2 i+ A
* j/ E# L2 {. Psome say we should keep personal remorse from the 8 Z+ G* F) `) X4 f; Z" r7 E
poem,! ]) X; m5 N/ x8 j1 C1 P" b
stay abstract, and there is some reason in this,
) M( ~9 [, x3 mbut jezus;8 n( l( e- |- q' Z5 s
twelve poems gone and I don't keep carbons and you have
( B+ |; D& v; q# s M' U# mmy
1 B7 S" L) \( h9 Z7 C. epaintings too, my best ones; it's stifling;
' @% A6 |( O6 n4 O. v/ _are you trying to crush me out like the rest of them?
5 i( c+ T7 f J- nwhy didn't you take my money? they usually do
- U* {$ f, a1 K% g/ {' ~3 ?from the sleeping drunken pants sick in the corner.' X0 U8 s% s/ M$ w9 y# A0 N
next time take my left arm or a fifty' Q6 Z5 L! O2 H. l2 F0 O+ M$ N
but not my poems:- }; }. i5 T( g
I'm not Shakespeare* a8 J% w+ n9 x: H- b: X7 o
but sometime simply
1 ?* E. S$ n% g; d; c, ]* E% `1 ]there won't be any more, abstract or otherwise;! k; b- e: P! o m* V
there'll always be money and whores and drunkards5 C9 X! j2 T. U+ A
down to the last bomb,% U0 @" }+ T, V2 u$ W) r, J3 O
but as God said,
: V. k7 ~3 Z& L! Mcrossing his legs,; p! i2 r$ s+ X" L K% S2 s
I see where I have made plenty of poets2 P+ t E3 F5 ? X
but not so very much
0 ?; M( n R! D1 i( Npoetry.2 o) u) `+ V$ y: o
4 e8 H- A& }( x3 A& Y! ?
& \/ H D0 k. r3 ?" o# O. a9 M( M4 B
, @3 Z% `( H; c- e
|