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惠特曼:哦,船长,我的船长!

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21#
发表于 2021-12-9 15:43 | 只看该作者
李_世_纯 发表于 2021-12-9 15:41
其第一.二两句,翻译有误

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,

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22#
发表于 2021-12-9 15:44 | 只看该作者
董力萁 发表于 2021-12-8 08:37
他愿意,不行吗?

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23#
发表于 2021-12-10 10:07 | 只看该作者
O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather'd every
rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red!
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up -for you the flag is flung -for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths-for you the shores crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here, Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head;
It is some dream that on the deck
You've fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm , he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult, Oh shores! and ring, Oh bells!
But I,with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.哦,船长,我的船长!
文/惠特曼


哦,船长,我的船长!我们险恶的航程已经告终
我们的船安渡过惊涛骇浪,我们寻求的奖赏已赢得手中。
港口已经不远,钟声我已听见,万千人众在欢呼呐喊,
目迎着我们的船从容返航,我们的船威严而且勇敢。
可是,心啊!心啊!心啊!
哦,殷红的血滴流泻,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
哦,船长,我的船长!起来吧,请听听这钟声,
起来,——旌旗,为你招展——号角,为你长鸣。
为你,岸上挤满了人群——为你,无数花束、彩带、花环。
为你熙攘的群众在呼唤,转动着多少殷切的脸。
这里,船长!亲爱的父亲!
你头颅下边是我的手臂!
这是甲板上的一场梦啊,
你已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
我们的船长不作回答,他的双唇惨白、寂静,
我的父亲不能感觉我的手臂,他已没有脉搏、没有生命,
我们的船已安全抛锚碇泊,航行已完成,已告终,
胜利的船从险恶的旅途归来,我们寻求的已赢得手中。
欢呼,哦,海岸!轰鸣,哦,洪钟!
可是,我却轻移悲伤的步履,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。

(江枫译)
-----------------------------------------

章首1.2两行
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24#
发表于 2021-12-10 10:24 | 只看该作者
李_世_纯 发表于 2021-12-10 10:07
O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,


O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather'd every
rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red!
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up -for you the flag is flung -for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths-for you the shores crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here, Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head;
It is some dream that on the deck
You've fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm , he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult, Oh shores! and ring, Oh bells!
But I,with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.哦,船长,我的船长!
文/惠特曼


哦,船长,我的船长!我们险恶的航程已经告终
我们的船安渡过惊涛骇浪,我们寻求的奖赏已赢得手中。
港口已经不远,钟声我已听见,万千人众在欢呼呐喊,
目迎着我们的船从容返航,我们的船威严而且勇敢。
可是,心啊!心啊!心啊!
哦,殷红的血滴流泻,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
哦,船长,我的船长!起来吧,请听听这钟声,
起来,——旌旗,为你招展——号角,为你长鸣。
为你,岸上挤满了人群——为你,无数花束、彩带、花环。
为你熙攘的群众在呼唤,转动着多少殷切的脸。
这里,船长!亲爱的父亲!
你头颅下边是我的手臂!
这是甲板上的一场梦啊,
你已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
我们的船长不作回答,他的双唇惨白、寂静,
我的父亲不能感觉我的手臂,他已没有脉搏、没有生命,
我们的船已安全抛锚碇泊,航行已完成,已告终,
胜利的船从险恶的旅途归来,我们寻求的已赢得手中。
欢呼,哦,海岸!轰鸣,哦,洪钟!
可是,我却轻移悲伤的步履,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。

(江枫译)
-----------------------------------------

先看章首1.2两行,至少蓝色部分译者误读误导其本人及汉语读者;试想:1. 险恶的偷渡行刺,险恶的黑奴走私 ... ...告终勉强可以,权作适合;然其航程全文看,属正义之旅,凯旋告捷之旅,足见译者不懂历史同时,不懂翻译须综合考虑作译
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25#
发表于 2021-12-10 10:33 | 只看该作者
李_世_纯 发表于 2021-12-10 10:24
O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,

O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather'd every
rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red!
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up -for you the flag is flung -for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths-for you the shores crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here, Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head;
It is some dream that on the deck
You've fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm , he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult, Oh shores! and ring, Oh bells!
But I,with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.哦,船长,我的船长!
文/惠特曼


哦,船长,我的船长!我们险恶的航程已经告终
我们的船安渡过惊涛骇浪,我们寻求的奖赏已赢得手中。
港口已经不远,钟声我已听见,万千人众在欢呼呐喊,
目迎着我们的船从容返航,我们的船威严而且勇敢。
可是,心啊!心啊!心啊!
哦,殷红的血滴流泻,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
哦,船长,我的船长!起来吧,请听听这钟声,
起来,——旌旗,为你招展——号角,为你长鸣。
为你,岸上挤满了人群——为你,无数花束、彩带、花环。
为你熙攘的群众在呼唤,转动着多少殷切的脸。
这里,船长!亲爱的父亲!
你头颅下边是我的手臂!
这是甲板上的一场梦啊,
你已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
我们的船长不作回答,他的双唇惨白、寂静,
我的父亲不能感觉我的手臂,他已没有脉搏、没有生命,
我们的船已安全抛锚碇泊,航行已完成,已告终,
胜利的船从险恶的旅途归来,我们寻求的已赢得手中。
欢呼,哦,海岸!轰鸣,哦,洪钟!
可是,我却轻移悲伤的步履,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。

(江枫译)
-----------------------------------------

先看章首1.2两行,至少蓝色部分译者误读误导其本人及汉语读者;试想:2. 全文看,其航程岂止历尽惊涛骇浪,激流险滩呢?触礁搁浅?久旱不雨没淡水呢?足见译者不懂历史同时,不懂翻译须细节考虑作译

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26#
发表于 2021-12-10 10:57 | 只看该作者
李_世_纯 发表于 2021-12-10 10:33
O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,

O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather'd every
rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red!
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up -for you the flag is flung -for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths-for you the shores crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here, Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head;
It is some dream that on the deck
You've fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm , he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult, Oh shores! and ring, Oh bells!
But I,with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.哦,船长,我的船长!
文/惠特曼


哦,船长,我的船长!我们险恶的航程已经告终
我们的船安渡过惊涛骇浪,我们寻求的奖赏已赢得手中。
港口已经不远,钟声我已听见,万千人众在欢呼呐喊,
目迎着我们的船从容返航,我们的船威严而且勇敢。
可是,心啊!心啊!心啊!
哦,殷红的血滴流泻,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
哦,船长,我的船长!起来吧,请听听这钟声,
起来,——旌旗,为你招展——号角,为你长鸣。
为你,岸上挤满了人群——为你,无数花束、彩带、花环。
为你熙攘的群众在呼唤,转动着多少殷切的脸。
这里,船长!亲爱的父亲!
你头颅下边是我的手臂!
这是甲板上的一场梦啊,
你已倒下,已死去,已冷却。
我们的船长不作回答,他的双唇惨白、寂静,
我的父亲不能感觉我的手臂,他已没有脉搏、没有生命,
我们的船已安全抛锚碇泊,航行已完成,已告终,
胜利的船从险恶的旅途归来,我们寻求的已赢得手中。
欢呼,哦,海岸!轰鸣,哦,洪钟!
可是,我却轻移悲伤的步履,
在甲板上,那里躺着我的船长,
他已倒下,已死去,已冷却。

(江枫译)
-----------------------------------------

先看章首1.2两行,至少蓝色部分译者误读误导其本人及汉语读者;试想:3. 英文 prize一词译者理解失误,其义用在抽象泛指,宏观广义非具体一金一石;有如询问夷人:您这二手车辆耗资多少金额,多少款,几何费?足见译者不懂历史同时,不懂中外语言同样,有约定俗成细节,翻译须特别考虑作译

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27#
发表于 2021-12-10 14:23 | 只看该作者
李_世_纯 发表于 2021-12-10 10:57
O Captain!My Captain

O Captain! My Captain! Our fearful trip is done,

更错在:之上几错均有错在,英文单词原词义并未含错译之义
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